Barriers to Therapy: What Might Be Getting in the Way (and Why That’s Normal)

Thinking about starting therapy can bring up a mix of emotions — hope, curiosity, uncertainty, even fear. Many people spend months or even years considering counselling before taking that first step, and that’s completely understandable.

We’re often told to “keep going” or “stay strong,” so asking for help can feel unfamiliar or even uncomfortable. But if you’ve ever found yourself wondering whether therapy might help — and then talking yourself out of it — you’re not alone.

Below are some of the most common barriers to therapy, and some gentle thoughts about why they show up, and how you might begin to move through them.

“I’m not bad enough for therapy.”

It’s very common to believe therapy should be “saved” for people in crisis — that unless you’re falling apart, you shouldn’t take up space. But therapy isn’t just for emergencies. It’s for anyone wanting to understand themselves better, find clarity, or stop small worries becoming bigger ones.

You don’t have to be in crisis to deserve support. Everyone’s pain matters.

“I should be able to handle this on my own.”

If you’ve always had to be the strong one, or learned early on to cope alone, reaching out for help can feel like failure. But therapy doesn’t take away your independence — it strengthens it.

It’s a space to explore what’s happening beneath the surface and to build on your own strengths, rather than carrying everything alone.

“I don’t want to burden anyone.”

Many people worry that talking about their struggles will make them a burden. But therapy is a place designed entirely for you.

Your counsellor isn’t there out of obligation — it’s their role to listen and hold space without judgement or emotional cost to you. You’re not a burden here; you’re a human being with feelings that matter.

“I tried therapy once and it didn’t help.”

That can be really disheartening. Sometimes the timing wasn’t right, or the connection with the therapist didn’t feel safe enough.

Therapy is a relationship, and like any relationship, it needs trust and the right fit to work.If it didn’t help before, it doesn’t mean therapy can’t help — it may just take finding the right person or approach.

“I’m scared of what might come up.”

Opening up can feel daunting, especially if you’ve kept painful memories tucked away for a long time. Therapy goes at your pace. You don’t have to talk about everything all at once — or ever — if you’re not ready.

A good therapist will focus on helping you feel safe first, so difficult emotions can be explored gently, not all at once.

“I wouldn’t know what to say.”

You don’t need to come with a plan or a list of topics. It’s completely normal to feel unsure at first — many people start therapy by saying exactly that!

Your counsellor will help you find the words for what feels confusing or hard to express. Silence is also welcome. Therapy is simply a space for whatever needs to show up that day.

“It’s too expensive / I don’t have time.”

Practical barriers are real. Therapy is a commitment, both financially and emotionally. But it’s also an investment in your wellbeing — a form of self-care that can make every other part of life feel more manageable.

Even a short block of sessions can bring clarity and insight. If cost or time are concerns, many counsellors offer flexible options or shorter-term work focused on specific goals.

Why These Feelings Are Normal

Each of these barriers comes from somewhere — often from past experiences, protective coping patterns, or simple fear of the unknown. They’re not signs of weakness; they’re your mind’s way of keeping you safe.

Therapy isn’t about pushing through resistance — it’s about understanding it. Even noticing what holds you back is part of the healing process.

If You’re Thinking About Therapy

You don’t need to wait until things feel unmanageable. If you’ve been feeling stuck, anxious, or simply disconnected from yourself, therapy can help you unpack what’s been happening and find gentler ways forward.

Reaching out for support takes courage — and it’s completely okay to do it at your own pace. Sometimes, even reading pages like this is the first step toward change.

🌿 If any of this resonates…

You’re very welcome to get in touch to talk things through or arrange an initial session. There’s no pressure or expectation — just a space to see whether therapy might feel like a good fit for you.

You can reach me via the contact form or by email if that feels easier. Whatever you choose, please know that hesitation is normal — and that support will always be there when you’re ready.