Intrusive Thoughts: When Your Mind Says the Scariest Things

Have you ever had a sudden, unwanted thought pop into your head that felt upsetting, disturbing, or completely out of character?

It might be something violent, inappropriate, or just deeply uncomfortable. These are called intrusive thoughts — and although they can feel frightening, they are surprisingly common.

You might think:– Why did I think that?– Does this mean something is wrong with me?– Am I a bad person for thinking this?

The truth is: having an intrusive thought doesn't mean you want it to happen, or that you would ever act on it. In fact, people who are distressed by their intrusive thoughts are often the least likely to act on them — because they care so deeply about doing the right thing.

What are intrusive thoughts?

Intrusive thoughts are involuntary — they show up without warning and often fixate on themes like:

• Harming others or yourself

• Sexuality or morality

• Religion or offending someone

• Losing control or making a mistake

These thoughts can feel so intense that you may start avoiding certain places, people, or even situations where a thought once occurred. You may also try to “cancel them out” with rituals or reassurance-seeking, which can make the cycle even stronger.

Counselling and psychoeducation can help

One of the most powerful things we can do in counselling is to normalise intrusive thoughts and help you relate to them differently. Rather than trying to push them away (which often makes them stronger), we can:

• Learn why they happen (hint: it's not your fault)

• Gently challenge the fear they bring

• Explore where they may connect to anxiety, trauma, or perfectionism

• Build tools to reduce the fear and emotional charge they hold

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You are not your thoughts. You are someone living with a mind that’s trying to protect you — even if it’s doing so in a way that feels confusing or painful right now.

Healing begins when you feel safe to talk about the things you’ve been afraid to say out loud. In counselling, there’s no judgment — just space to understand, unpack, and gently let go of what no longer serves you.